Away! By an Imperfect Imposter
I’m
supposed to be scared of the dark ‘cause
there is
no burning fire lighting the way. These
maps
that cloud my mind are just inoperative words.
“Guide
me!” but where am I going? Are
all my
destinations harboring secret knives?
Metal
and pen mark up my world, so much that
the sky
is starting to bleed with firefly blood. Often,
rather
than sometimes, they leave me behind and leave.
These
are the places and faces that leave scars.
It is
the fear
of
 |
| Flip this upside down |
Noor, Excellent job using the Golden Shovel to uncover a poem of your own. I like the cleverness of your final line using a whole line as your final word! And you've come up with some beautiful lines: maps that cloud my mind, etc., is very fine--I like the weirdness of the diction of inoperative there; and the finale, from Metal and pen, is particularly strong. This poem has earned its own title!
ReplyDeleteNoor, I loved this poem. I thought the idea of using the multimedia to pretty much finish your poem was awesome, and the topic was really good. Not knowing where you are headed is something I can relate to. I think my favorite part of this piece, however, was the first line. I thought using the word "supposed" was awesome and gave me incentive to keep reading. The only part of the poem that I stumbled on was line 8 when you said "leave me behind and leave"- I thought the word leave was too much to have that close together. Great poem, loved it.
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